Chapter 13: Fire

If It Doesn't Kill Us It Makes Us Stronger

Chapter 13: Fire

As time began to pass and our last year of high school came to a close, I began to panic. The Field Trip was at the very beginning of the year and even though I never aced biology, I know that means Rayven will be expecting very soon. Whenever I don't know what to do, I go to my family and friends. Since family wasn't an option and Isaac and I were no longer on speaking terms, I turned to Robyn. "What should I do, Robyn?"

At first she just stood there smiling at me. Recently, Robyn had adopted a new wardrobe to go with her new hair. I still wasn't quite sure why she did, something about wanting to anger her dad. Robyn's been doing a lot of things to anger her dad. She started hanging out with different people at school, the kind that smoke pot. Maybe she was happier now though, I don't know what she was dealing with, so I didn't judge her. It was different when I was freaking out about how my life was about to change forever and she offered nothing.

Admittedly, I was wrong for raising my voice at her, but it did get her to focus.

At this point I was being driven crazy by my conundrum. Do I give up the rest of my life in order to immediately move in with Rayven and raise our kid? If I want to go off to college and try to live like a typical adult, does that make me selfish?

Robyn saw the sadness and fear on my face and began to console me.

"Of course you can continue living your life, Logan! If you stop doing what you want then you aren't even living anymore, you're just existing. Whose to say that being with that child every moment of the day would be what's best for them? I wish my childhood didn't feature my dad."

I was so thankful that Robyn was hearing me out and offering helpful advice. "You are incredible. You keep giving me reasons to love you." As soon as the words left my lips, I regretted them.

She gave me that look. That look of hers that has the ability to shoot me down completely without her having to say a word. "I love ya, Logan, I really do, but I am in no position to date someone right now. I just wanna have fun, isn't that what being a teenager is all about?  I thought you could handle our hook up situation - be able to separate feelings from actions - but I guess I was wrong."

I lashed out at her. "Well, gee. I wish we were on the same page. You didn't think to have a discussion with me about what was going on, you just started kissing me one day. My fault for thinking there was any emotion behind it."

Then she gave me a look that pierced directly through me. "I'm not your property. You don't own me. I can do whatever I want. I owe you nothing, not even an explanation."  Robyn began walking out of the door before turning and saying, "Oh yeah, you weren't the only guy either".

The very next day, I was walking through the hallway and saw Robyn in the library. From outside the door it appeared to be her talking to someone.

As soon as I cracked open the door, I saw Robyn kissing some dude. I guess I really wasn't the only one. This was so unlike Robyn though, I began to worry. Or maybe this was just my first time truly experiencing her. She's like a flame, beautiful from afar but if you aren't careful, you'll get burned.