Wednesday, August 17, 2016

Chapter 32: Fairytales

If It Doesn't Kill Us It Makes Us Stronger

Chapter 32: Fairytales

After receiving the news, I felt miserable. I decided that I should start attending therapy. Learning of my diagnosis brought this sort of depression.

We had weekly sessions. I came to quite a few realizations with her. I always looked for outer means of happiness because there was this void from never having met my parents. My therapist theorizes that perhaps I was so drawn to Robyn because she reminded me of my parents. Though I don't remember them, I did live with them for the first four years of my life. I told my therapist everything. I told her about how I'm a teacher and I finally feel like my life has a purpose.

Somehow our conversations always returned to Robyn. I told her how the wedding was the most mortifying moment of my life. That's when she told me that I had to reach out to Robyn again. She told me that much of my unhappiness comes from these unresolved feelings that I have for her. She told me that at the very least I need closure.
 I decided to take some time to think it through before I did anything I might regret

After I told Lory of my disease, she decided to take a gap year before starting university so that she could stay with me. I told her that was unnecessary, but she insisted. I'm just glad that teaching allowed me to save up enough money to get a house again.
I was surprised when Lory entered my room one night. She was in tears and looked frantic. She was thinking about my grandma.
"Dad, I know that your grandma kicked you out when she found out you were gonna be a father. Do you ever regret having me? Do you wish mom never got pregnant?"

I looked into her eyes, genuinely confused. How could someone so wonderful ever doubt that they're wanted.  "Of course not, Lory. You are constantly amazing me. I don't deserve to have such a wonderful daughter." I wiped the tears from her face as we hugged.
"I heard you on the phone with Isaac. You've been telling him about your therapy sessions. I know that you're debating on whether or not to reach out to Robyn again. I think that you just have to."

That was the push I needed to reach out to her. I called Robyn that same night and she answered. We told each other about how our lives were going. It's been five years since the wedding. She told me about how she's a caretaker now. I told her about my disease and how it's begun to affect me. She rushed over as soon as she could. She told me that she felt compelled to care for me. She would help around the house, cook meals, and even massage my back when it ached. After a few months, we both agreed that it was best if she just moved in with Lory and I.

Her and Lory got along swimmingly.  Eventually, the months turned to a year. Lory left for school and it was a tearful parting. She'd stop by every now and again while in university but for the most part, it was just Robyn and I. After living together for a few years, this 'dance' was getting tiring. I felt like a teenager all over again. I started feeling flustered every time she brushed past me. I started being able to taste the love cooked in her food.
I promised myself that I'd never put my heart at risk of being crushed by her ever again. If something were to come from this, she would have to initiate it

I was having trouble getting out of bed when she assisted me. Our eyes locked and without saying a word, she began kissing me. Sure, we had kissed before, but that was years ago and it didn't mean nearly as much as it meant now.
"Did I wait too long? Is it too late?," she asked me.
"It's never too late. This feels so right."

Oh yeah! 

Robyn and Isaac are still together. They eloped only a few short months after fleeing the wedding. Now they have three beautiful children.

There's Jamie,


and Olivia.

So, I think it's safe to say that everyone ended up with their fairytale ending. 

I won't lie, at some moments it hardly felt worth it to keep on. I never thought there would be a day when I felt this happy.  I guess it's true what they say, 

"If it doesn't kill you, it makes you stronger."